The God Who Holds What Breaks Me

"You have taken account of my wanderings; Put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your book?" (Psalms 56:8)

"He knows the way I take." (Job 23:10) “Stop the world, I want to get off now,” I would occasionally hear my mother say.

Life can be incredibly hard when we are hurting, lonely, or grieving. Things seem

to travel at the speed of light and come at us whether we are ready for them or not,

while healing is painfully slow.

The holidays can feel more like a punch in the gut—another reminder of what we’re

not up to facing yet. What once brought joy now overwhelms us with sorrow, and

we wish we could somehow be air-lifted over to another day, time, or season.

Longing for a reprieve… to be comforted in our tears, for a day of hope to dawn

and daylight to come in once again. It’s the journey no one would choose: “Stop the

world, I want to get off now.”

It is a hurt that only God can truly touch and heal, but thankfully one that He patiently

walks beside us in, minute by minute and day by day. He takes our hand and leads

us through the valley of weeping, gathering our tears and holding us close, remaining

near to us in each step.

“He knows the way we take.”

We don’t have to do it alone.

We don’t have to figure it all out.

We just take the next step, and He meets us there.

Even when we feel like we have lost our way or will lose our mind, He will still be there

to guide us. The single most comforting thing I have found is His presence with me

—Emmanuel, “God with us.”

When Christmas was too much and the way seemed too impossible to cross,

focusing on Jesus—literally the Christ in Christmas—helped me to see beyond

the moment when I could not see a second ahead.

And not just for Christmas, but for each day. Oh friend, “The Man of Sorrows” knows

our every sorrow and just exactly what we need. My favorite pastor and dear friend

used to remind us that “healing comes in layers, very thin layers, over time,” but it does

come.

So, if you are in the throes of it now, my heart aches and literally breaks for you…

I want to remind you, He is here for you, just as He was—and still is—for me now.

He says, “Call upon Me and I will answer you.”

“He will call upon Me, and I will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble;

I will rescue him and honor him.”

(Psalm 91:15)

I know sometimes the roots are too deep or the tunnel too dark.

At times it feels like there is no real help or hope in sight, and we’re

left feeling empty and alone. There is no quick fix or simple solution;

we find ourselves just having to go through it. We may even wonder if

God is still there. It’s in those times that words can seem the hollowest,

the needs so much deeper than the shallow waters. It can feel impossible

just to find your footing.

Yet He who remains faithful upholds us with His righteous right hand,

holding tightly onto us and carrying us through even when we cannot see

or feel like He is with us. He has promised to never leave or forsake us.

Tears… we often try to hold them back or keep them locked up inside.

We may want to hide them from others or believe it will control the pain.

But they are part of the healing process. We need to grieve the individual

things… we grieve what we miss, who we loved, what is gone… until the

wounds begin to heal and the memories become a blessing again, or we

become completely whole in Heaven.

We slow the process when we deny its need. Tears communicate

what words cannot. They express what the heart cannot say

but what God can still hear and know.

The greater the love, the greater the loss,

the more deeply we need

God to come into it and help us through.

Listen for a moment to the words of Isaiah, speaking of Jesus.

This is Jesus’ calling—His ministry. Pay close attention to the words:

“The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me,

Because the LORD has anointed me

To bring good news to the afflicted;

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,

To proclaim liberty to captives

And freedom to prisoners;

To proclaim the favorable year of the LORD

And the day of vengeance of our God;

To comfort all who mourn,

To grant those who mourn in Zion,

Giving them a garland instead of ashes,

The oil of gladness instead of mourning,

The mantle of praise instead of a spirit of fainting.

So they will be called oaks of righteousness,

The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified.”

(Isaiah 61:1–3)

When you cry out to Jesus, He sees you and He hears you.

When we draw near to Him, He draws near to us (James 4:8).

“The LORD is near to the brokenhearted

And saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

(Psalm 34:18)

When we need someone who is greater, stronger,

and more able to help us—more capable than any

earthly means could ever provide

—Jesus is praying…

“Therefore, He is able also to save forever

those who draw near to God through Him,

since He always lives to make intercession for them.”

(Hebrews 7:25)

And when we are at a complete loss

as to what to do or how to face another day,

He says,

“Call upon Me in the day of trouble;

I shall rescue you, and you will honor Me.”

(Psalm 50:15)

“Call to Me and I will answer you,

and I will tell you great and mighty things,

which you do not know.”

(Jeremiah 33:3)

We may not know the way, but He does.

Our Good Shepherd will lead the way,

and we can trust Him to bring us home.

“Surely our griefs He Himself bore,

and our sorrows He carried.”

(Isaiah 53:4)

Give yourself time.

Give yourself grace.

Give yourself rest.

Grieving is hard work.

Pause for a moment

and let the world stand still.

Look up to Heaven and

call upon Him today.

“Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace,

that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help

in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)